If the road to joy is through the surrender to the self — that is to one’s feelings — the first step in the therapeutic process is to sense and express one’s sadness… To express that sadness, one needs to cry…
To express sadness leads to an awareness of loss and evokes longing.
To long for someone or to need someone leaves the person open to possible rejection and humiliation.
Not wanting or not feeling desire is a defense against possible hurt.
– Alexander Lowen
Whether we like it or not, it is held within our very nature to be interconnected and interdependent.
The quest for living a consistently independent life is often pseudo-independence, created by blocking out the pain of a lifetime of unmet needs. The head-strong-ego-driven-will insists we are just fine on our own. Contempt and disgust surge within us at the very mention of the words “needy”, “weak”, “vulnerable”, or “dependent”. Our head reassures us that these words only apply to others. Our contempt indicates we lack acceptance of our own normal, natural human needs and feelings. Within our deprivation, blocked longing for contact and connection only compounds the difficulty as we pull away from opportunities where we actually could get these needs met.
Plain and simple: we need each other. And our relational wounds only heal within relationships.
Don’t forget we changed the date for the Ubuntu group in April. We will not meet on the 3rd Friday; we will meet on the 4th Friday.
I hope to see you there.
P.S. The deadline for the retreat deposit is coming up soon. We have a few openings left. If you are interested in joining us, even if you don’t know for sure yet, please let us know. We would love to have you join us. : )
Ubuntu group – OC
Fri Apr 27 6:30p-9:30p (TRE is part of the shared group experience and starts promptly at 6:30p.)
Optional: bring veggie foods to share
Every human being truly becomes a human by means of relationships with other human beings.